My Mom asked me this morning if the title of our blog was a typo. "Shouldn't it be 'These Are THE Days," she asked? I kind of chuckled to myself and emailed her back and explained that the title of our blog comes from the song that Mike and I danced to at our wedding: These Are Days by 10,000 Maniacs (funny: in addition to the song being meaningful, the name of the group also seems kind of prophetic of our family, huh?). I remember people giving me a raised eyebrow when we were planning our wedding and we chose this song for our first dance. If you know it, you've probably already remembered that it's not a slow song. It's not even really a sappy love song. But, we love the lyrics and they really expressed how we felt then (and still do!) and what we desired for our life together: to live in the moment, enjoying each other and the journey we would walk together, enjoying these days and knowing how blessed we are to be together. If you read the lyrics in the context of our adoption, it takes on even more meaning:
These Are Days
Artist: 10,000 Maniacs
copyright, 1992
These are days you'll remember.
Never before and never since, I promise, will the whole world be warm as this.
And as you feel it, you'll know its true that you are blessed and lucky.
Its true that you are touched by something that will grow and bloom in you.
These are days you'll remember.
When may is rushing over you with desire to be part of the miracles you see in every hour.
You'll know its true that you are blessed and lucky.
Its true that you are touched by something that will grow and bloom in you.
These are days.
These are the days you might fill with laughter until you break.
These days you might feel a shaft of light make its way across your face.
And when you do you'll know how it was meant to be.
See the signs and know their meaning.
Its true, you'll know how it was meant to be.
Hear the signs and know they're speaking to you, to you.
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AAI's Layla House and Wanna House are located in Ethiopia's capital city, Addis Ababa
1 John 4:19 says: "We love because He first loved us." Our hope is that our adoption will not be an event for our family alone. We pray that you will join us on this journey, beginning with this blog, and share in the many trials and triumphs that surely lie ahead. This is a journey that we are only capable of because of the great love our God has for us, and for His children the world over. Welcome ...
Promises
Isaiah 43:5: "Do not be afraid, for I am with you; I will bring your children from the east and gather you from the west."
Philippians 4:19: “And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 4:19: “And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.”
Ethiopia
AAI's Layla House and Wanna House are located in Ethiopia's capital city, Addis Ababa
Local Time, Addis Ababa, Ethiopia
Why Ethiopia?
*Ethiopia is a beautiful landscape and a country rich in culture, history and heritage
*Ethiopia is an ancient Christian nation, named in the Bible as Axum
*As a culture, Ethiopians value their children and love them with a love that sometimes transcends our understanding
*One in ten children die before their first birthday
* One in six children die before their fifth birthday
* 44% of the population of Ethiopia is under 15 years old
* 60% of children in Ethiopia are stunted due to malnutrition
* The median age in Ethiopia is 17.8 years; the average life span is 37 years
* Half the children in Ethiopia will never attend school; 88% will never attend secondary school
* Ethiopia has the highest HIV/AIDS population in the world
* There are 4.8 million orphans in Ethiopia; 1.2 million children have been orphaned by AIDS alone
* Ethiopia’s doctor to children ratio is 1 to 24,000
* In the 1980's one million Ethiopians died of starvation
* Drought struck the country again from 2000-2002 (1st year no crops, 2nd year no seeds, 3rd year no animals)
* Only 24% of households have access to safe drinking water
* 82% of the population survives on less than 1 dollar a day
* Coffee prices (Ethiopia’s only major export) fell 40-60% from 1998-2002
* Per capita, Ethiopia receives less aid than any country in Africa
* In 1993, after 30 long years of war, Eritrea broke from Ethiopia and became an independent nation leaving Ethiopia landlocked without any major seafaring ports
(adapted from a Yahoo group web posting and Unicef-Ethiopia)
*Ethiopia is an ancient Christian nation, named in the Bible as Axum
*As a culture, Ethiopians value their children and love them with a love that sometimes transcends our understanding
*One in ten children die before their first birthday
* One in six children die before their fifth birthday
* 44% of the population of Ethiopia is under 15 years old
* 60% of children in Ethiopia are stunted due to malnutrition
* The median age in Ethiopia is 17.8 years; the average life span is 37 years
* Half the children in Ethiopia will never attend school; 88% will never attend secondary school
* Ethiopia has the highest HIV/AIDS population in the world
* There are 4.8 million orphans in Ethiopia; 1.2 million children have been orphaned by AIDS alone
* Ethiopia’s doctor to children ratio is 1 to 24,000
* In the 1980's one million Ethiopians died of starvation
* Drought struck the country again from 2000-2002 (1st year no crops, 2nd year no seeds, 3rd year no animals)
* Only 24% of households have access to safe drinking water
* 82% of the population survives on less than 1 dollar a day
* Coffee prices (Ethiopia’s only major export) fell 40-60% from 1998-2002
* Per capita, Ethiopia receives less aid than any country in Africa
* In 1993, after 30 long years of war, Eritrea broke from Ethiopia and became an independent nation leaving Ethiopia landlocked without any major seafaring ports
(adapted from a Yahoo group web posting and Unicef-Ethiopia)
How Much Does Adoption Cost?
One of the most frequent questions we get is: "How much does adoption cost?"
Philosophically, the first answer to this question is that adoption, by its very nature, will have cost our child everything. Our child will have suffered more in his short life than we have ever, and, by God's grace, hopefully ever will. Our child, through the lens of three, four or perhaps five years of childhood, will have witnessed the death of his parents; will have perhaps been forced to wander the streets for food and shelter; will perhaps have been taken in by a stranger and then dropped in an orphanage where there is no familiar sound, smell or smile -- he will have experienced the kind of fear that causes you to close your eyes to shut out the desperate world around him. Adoption will have cost him everything.
I've heard several people comment that our child is so "lucky" to be adopted by our family or how "good" we are to be "doing this." I understand the heart of these comments -- and honestly, I think before I really started learning about children who have been orphaned, I probably would have had the same thoughts -- but when we stop to think about it, NO child is lucky to be adopted, because to be adopted one must first be orphaned.
What adoption is, however, is God's hand of love and grace and mercy on a child who, through no fault of their own, has lived in the depths of our fallen world where tragedy and death are realities. Adoption has nothing to do with US and it has everything to do with God. This is not a story of what WE are doing. It is a story of what GOD is doing. God loves this child SO much that He is giving him a second family. For reasons I do not necessarily understand, God has chosen us to be part of HIS plan for HIS child. As a result, God is putting HIS love in our hearts for HIS child. We will love him as our own. But he is not lucky and we are not good. We are, however, both loved beyond measure by our Father in Heaven and we are being used by Him to fulfill His perfect plan for us.
Now, before you get frustrated with me, I understand that most people are asking about our financial cost, however, and the answer to that question is: "a lot." :-) Since we are being very open about our Ethiopian adoption, I thought I would go ahead and outline how the fees are broken out:
Initial Application Fee: $200
Homestudy Fee: $1400 + $200 for the update we needed
Immigration Fees: $685
AAI Agency Fee: $2000
Ethiopia Country Fee: $6000 (for one child, 7-9 years old; $2000 is paid with dossier submission and $4000 is paid after the adoption is finalized in Ethiopian court)
Travel: $7522
Total: $18,007
As I've posted before we have never had this entire sum sitting in our savings account. To God's glory alone we have had the needed amounts available in our savings account each time a fee has been required. (We have made it through the first part of the country fee.) We have gratefully and humbly received gifts from friends, family and even people we don't know or haven't met! No gift has ever been too small and each one has come at precisely the time when we needed some help to meet one of these fee deadlines. We continue to walk in faith that God will use people, organizations and opportunities to provide each amount as it is required according to HIS timeline.
Philosophically, the first answer to this question is that adoption, by its very nature, will have cost our child everything. Our child will have suffered more in his short life than we have ever, and, by God's grace, hopefully ever will. Our child, through the lens of three, four or perhaps five years of childhood, will have witnessed the death of his parents; will have perhaps been forced to wander the streets for food and shelter; will perhaps have been taken in by a stranger and then dropped in an orphanage where there is no familiar sound, smell or smile -- he will have experienced the kind of fear that causes you to close your eyes to shut out the desperate world around him. Adoption will have cost him everything.
I've heard several people comment that our child is so "lucky" to be adopted by our family or how "good" we are to be "doing this." I understand the heart of these comments -- and honestly, I think before I really started learning about children who have been orphaned, I probably would have had the same thoughts -- but when we stop to think about it, NO child is lucky to be adopted, because to be adopted one must first be orphaned.
What adoption is, however, is God's hand of love and grace and mercy on a child who, through no fault of their own, has lived in the depths of our fallen world where tragedy and death are realities. Adoption has nothing to do with US and it has everything to do with God. This is not a story of what WE are doing. It is a story of what GOD is doing. God loves this child SO much that He is giving him a second family. For reasons I do not necessarily understand, God has chosen us to be part of HIS plan for HIS child. As a result, God is putting HIS love in our hearts for HIS child. We will love him as our own. But he is not lucky and we are not good. We are, however, both loved beyond measure by our Father in Heaven and we are being used by Him to fulfill His perfect plan for us.
Now, before you get frustrated with me, I understand that most people are asking about our financial cost, however, and the answer to that question is: "a lot." :-) Since we are being very open about our Ethiopian adoption, I thought I would go ahead and outline how the fees are broken out:
Initial Application Fee: $200
Homestudy Fee: $1400 + $200 for the update we needed
Immigration Fees: $685
AAI Agency Fee: $2000
Ethiopia Country Fee: $6000 (for one child, 7-9 years old; $2000 is paid with dossier submission and $4000 is paid after the adoption is finalized in Ethiopian court)
Travel: $7522
Total: $18,007
As I've posted before we have never had this entire sum sitting in our savings account. To God's glory alone we have had the needed amounts available in our savings account each time a fee has been required. (We have made it through the first part of the country fee.) We have gratefully and humbly received gifts from friends, family and even people we don't know or haven't met! No gift has ever been too small and each one has come at precisely the time when we needed some help to meet one of these fee deadlines. We continue to walk in faith that God will use people, organizations and opportunities to provide each amount as it is required according to HIS timeline.
Adoption Related Books
- The Holy Bible
- There Is No Me Without You - Melissa Fay Green
- The Strength of Mercy - Jan Beazely
- I'm Chocolate, You're Vanilla - Marguerite A. Wright
- Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew - Sherrie Eldridge
Adoption Related Links
About Me
- Julie
- I am a 32 year old stay at home Mom, married to my husband of 12 years and with four biological children. My passion for orphans began as a tiny seed that God planted in my heart when I was 14 years old during a two-week trip to Jamaica. On that trip, I saw the world through new eyes and recognized the devastating poverty in which the developing world lives. Since then and especially in the last five years, my heart for orphans has grown from a compassion for the suffering to knowing with certainty that God alone put love in our hearts for a specific child we do not yet know. It is by God's mercy and grace alone that we are brought to experience this miracle called adoption.
Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress
James 1:27
James 1:27
2 comments:
Julie, when I first read the title of your blog, I immediately heard this (great!) song in my head. Good choice, and thanks for explaining it! Oh, and our recessional was Kool and the Gang, so I can't make any comments on crazy wedding songs. :)
Love, Karen
www.thesinglestep.blogspot.com
I always thought that was a perfect description of your relationship. And I can't comment, anyway, considering we had the Rocky them as our recessional :) This would be a funny website/poll to start to see what "different" songs people had in their weddings.
anyway, love you.
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